AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!

OK, I’ve been keeping track and there a couple of you out there that owe me a favor. I’m not mad, because I knew something like this would happen!
Call Ashlinn and let her know how much you can contribute and she’ll take care of the rest! Thanks in advance!

Internet, I Remember You Now!

As I mentioned in my last post, I got the internet. It’s kind of overwhelming. Not only do I have the old internet that I’m used to, I’ve also got access to Xbox Live and Netflix Instant Queue (30 Rock, Office, Lost). This is blowing my mind.
Now I have to get used to that whole Facebook layout that people were complaining about so much. I have to log in to webpages. I have multiple applications running concurrently. Like I said, mind blown.
All these Youtube videos.
So many blogs to read.
A plethora of bike pictures on Flickr.
I’m freaking out guys!

Maybe it’s a little late, but me and Kanye just wanted to say Happy thanksgiving.

“I Was In Junior High, Dickhead”

Last month, Marvel Comics was bought by the good old folks at Disney. A few years ago, Disney also picked up a fledgling network by the name of ABC. Do you see where I’m heading with this? All signs point to a LOST comic series. All signs except the ones being staked in the ground by a couple of jokers named Damon and Carlton.
Link.
I assure you, despite what everyone else is saying, there will be a LOST comic. Even if I have to make it myself.

Bonus: The person to properly identify the quote in the title will recieve a JPG of me giving them a thumbs up. NO Google IMDB or any other Internet bullshit tools.

Fidelity to the Blog

I have two very important announcements to make in this post.
The first one is a recession tip for thrifty folks with a sweet tooth (myself included.) I present exhibit A:

See that dollop of frosting and sprinkles? That has been abandoned by the buyer of the donut and is now up for grabs to the fortunate individual who finds it. Go on, take it, just be sure to use a tissue.
My second announcement is a little larger. The BLS just reported that the average employed American now works 33 hours in a week. All those furloughs have brought us to the shortest work week since these figures have been recorded, 1964.
Because of this, I have decided that any friends who come to visit me in Seattle are allegable to apply for a tax rebate up to $50. That’s right, I’ll reimburse you for the tax that you spend while visiting me. You’ll get a bonus $5 if you bring a skateboard.
Wondering if you qualify for the rebate?
Have we ever gone swimming together?
Have we ever shared a pizza pie?
Have you ever pretended to be interested in my LOST theories?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, pack your bags. See you soon.

If My Dad Wrote For LOST:

First order of business; build a woodshed. You’re never going to get a fire going with wet wood.
Everyone would be wearing blue Dickies, or no pants at all.
The boar that Locke caught would end up in a BLT sandwich. I have no clue where the lettuce, tomato or bread came from.
The biggest part of season 2 would have been finding a freezer in the hatch filled with Flavor-Ice pops.
Actually, by episode 2 they would have built a hovercraft and rescued themselves. Series over.

LOST Sadness!

I don’t know about you guys, but I’m pretty bummed about the lack of LOST this week. Here are some videos that will hopefully cheer you up.
LOST Rhapsody – Bohemian Rhapsody with a LOST twist. 1:00 is the funniest screencap from LOST ever.
LOST: The Rap – A little slow, but he does bring up some good points.
Sawyer Hates You Guys Song – Seriously.
Otters holding hands – This can’t not cheer you up!

“This Place is Death” & “316” Review

This Place is Death
The first time I watched “TPID” I was really unimpressed, mostly because of the abundance of Charlotte. Thank God she finally kicked the bucket at the end, after giving us her greatest contribution to the storyline so far; Faraday has been skateboarding around time to try to correct his greatest fuck ups. I can’t wait until they show him accidentally bringing his own mom to the Other’s Prom. The other reason this episode was the weakest of the season was the excess Sun. Yeah, she’s crazy, we get it. The last thing we need though is an episode filled with two secondary female characters trying to take the lead.
The biggest thing saving this episode is, surprisingly, Danielle Rousseau and her science crew. The producers had assured us that we would eventually see more of Danielle’s backstory and we’re finally getting it. I think Danielle was well played by the new actress (who actually has a French accent) and her baby’s daddy was one of the best characters I’ve seen on the show in a long time. Way cooler than Faraday, honestly.

316
This episode, unlike the previous, instantly struck me as the best one of the season so far. I didn’t think an off-island episode would ever be this good. First off, it was confirmed that Desmond remembered Ms. Hawking, which makes perfect sense because those memories should only be about three years old, since they didn’t actually happen until just before they got rescued. You follow me?
Another awesome thing about the episode is the invisible force that keeps Jack from drinking again. As he sat at a bar with a drink in front of him, Jack suddenly gets a call that brings him to a nursing home to visit his random grampa; Randpa. Later, when he gets home, he pours himself a drink but is distracted by a noisy Kate hiding in the bedroom. Which brings me to my favorite part of the episode! They finally did what I was hoping for. They killed off Aaron! OK, maybe they didn’t kill him, but I can only assume that Kate put him in a suitcase and kicked it off a bridge.
Oh shit! The Lap is back!
And then the closing surprise of Jin showing up in a cherry DI bus, clad in Dharma gear. I was very curious when the Ajira flight would drop the O6. Seems to be mid 70’s, Jin, and hopefully the rest of the cool survivors, have infiltrated the DI.
The only bogus part of the episode was the ridiculous second grade teacher tone that Eloise Hawking had to talk in to explain the pendulum. Come on!

Things I want explained, PRONTO:
What’s with Hurley’s guitar case? Is that a Charlie thing?
Who was the clever fellow who built the pendulum? Was it Widmore, using the Dharma Initiative to gain access to the island?
Is the frequency and placement of the time flashes significant or totally constructed just to tell awesome stories?
When Locke falls into the cave, is that a bone sticking out of his leg or is it a stick jabbed into it?
Will we ever see what’s down the smoke rabbit hole?

LOST “The Little Prince” Review & Comic 2

I’ve got to be honest with you, this episode is the weakest of the season so far. Maybe it’s just because I hate off-island Kate, but I would be much happier with an on-island/Desmond episode, until, of course Desmond is chillin’ with Kate in LA.
This episode did do a decent job of clearing up some of the questions I had about the time traveling deal. Yes, you can see what’s going on with past representations of island folk, and you may be able to interact with yourself? Perhaps? Doesn’t that go against the whole “your mind traveling through time, not your body” thing? I remember seeing the beam of light in the preview from last week and being pumped for it. John’s reaction to seeing it was awesome, and it hearkened back to the days of exciting drama that just happened to take place on a crazy island, instead of the current crazy island drama.

+ Faraday pretty much confirmed that Miles is Marvin Candle’s son. Case closed
+ Claire scenes without actually having to listen to anything new from her.
+ Young preggers Rousseau. How long have we been waiting for this?
+ On-island Kate makes an appearance…sweet.
+ Jin? Seriously?

– Jin? Seriously?
– Juliet’s facial hemorrhaging…eww
– Tony the nurse gives it up too easily. What kind of babies is Widmore hiring? Dharma henchmen will take a bullet before giving it up.
– The future inhabitants of the island apparently think it’s appropriate to wear blackface (and suck at aiming.)
– Still too much Aaron.

Bonus:
Alec in Huluwood – For those who “missed” the Superbowl, here’s the amazing Hulu commercial. I didn’t think it was possible, but this commercial actually made me love Hulu even more.

FrURLSday!

The old internet machine has taken a bit of a back seat this week. I’ve got shelves to build, lights to paint and more trail mix than I know what to do with. Seriously, where am I going to put all this trail mix.
Lovely Listing – A blog dedicated to poorly photographed apartments in rental ads. It’s sad that this blog has so much material. The writing isn’t great, but the pictures are hilarious! Courtesy of Ashlinn.
Wainy Days – David Wain’s webisodes. Funny stuff.
Keamy’s Paradise – For those who just can’t get over that season 4 madman.
Vern Fonk I swear to God, these are real commercials for a real insurance company. The northwest is weird.
Turn off your cell phone! – The funny thing is that I originally tried to watch this on my cell phone at work. OK, that’s not the funny thing. The funny thing is the guy trying to kill the other guy (spoiler). Courtesy of Bagtown.