I have two very important announcements to make in this post.
The first one is a recession tip for thrifty folks with a sweet tooth (myself included.) I present exhibit A:
See that dollop of frosting and sprinkles? That has been abandoned by the buyer of the donut and is now up for grabs to the fortunate individual who finds it. Go on, take it, just be sure to use a tissue.
My second announcement is a little larger. The BLS just reported that the average employed American now works 33 hours in a week. All those furloughs have brought us to the shortest work week since these figures have been recorded, 1964.
Because of this, I have decided that any friends who come to visit me in Seattle are allegable to apply for a tax rebate up to $50. That’s right, I’ll reimburse you for the tax that you spend while visiting me. You’ll get a bonus $5 if you bring a skateboard.
Wondering if you qualify for the rebate?
Have we ever gone swimming together?
Have we ever shared a pizza pie?
Have you ever pretended to be interested in my LOST theories?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, pack your bags. See you soon.